Archive for the ‘Staying faithful’ Category

MY TYPE OF WOMAN   Leave a comment

When I was 16, I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion. So, I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life. In college, I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So, I decided I needed a girl with stability.

When I was 28, I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement.

When I was 35, I found an exciting girl, but I couldn’t keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but direction-less. So, I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.

When I turned 42, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground and married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.

I am now 55 and am looking for a girl with really big tits.

(I hope I don’t have to tell you that this is supposed to be a joke – but it does illustrate how confused men can be about relationships.)

Happy love-making

Clive

Dame Helen Mirren   Leave a comment

Did you read Dame Helen’s little bit of home-spun philosophy, when she was addressing young graduates with one of her top tips for life?

“Don’t confuse sex with love. Love generally lasts more than two minutes.”

Advice rarely gets any better than that!

Happy love-making.

Clive 

One Night Stand   4 comments

Researchers at McMaster University in Canada tell us that men with deep voices are more attractive to women – this is because it is assumed they are more manly.

However, despite being drawn to such men, women thought they would be only suitable for short-term flings as very masculine men were considered to be more likely to cheat.

So, if you are blessed with a deep voice, you may need to work on your skills of devotion and character if you don’t want to wind up a lonely old man! You know where to come if you need help in this area.

Happy love-making.

Clive